How to Avoid Divorce
It may not be easy, but finding out how to avoid divorce is possible. Although many couples divorce, there are as many, quite possibly more, who stay together and manage to make their marriage work despite many problems.
Great progress can be made and divorce can be successfully avoided if both spouses make the firm decision to work out their problems and stay married no matter what. This commitment wins practically half the battle. An all-too-common reason why marriages fail is that the couple gives up on each other and their relationship, without exhausting all means to stay together.
Looking into how to avoid divorce, as mentioned earlier, is no easy task. The couple should be willing to devote time and energy into saving their marriage, correcting past errors, and moving forward together. If infidelity was the problem, the cheating spouse should make amends and strive to be a better and faithful spouse. His or her partner must also work hard at learning to forgive, and working out his or her anger, resentment and feelings of betrayal. Both partners need to exert real effort. It is not a one-man (or one-woman) show, even though only one of them had the extramarital affair. They must also learn from what happened. That a spouse strayed indicates that something was wrong or lacking in their union, and this led to the commission of the unfaithful act. This does not excuse the cheating spouse. What it does is it opens an opportunity for them to examine their marriage with fresh eyes, discover what needs to be corrected, and proceed to correct those flaws.
Divorce can be avoided more easily if wrongs and problems are detected early, and acknowledged properly. Minor transgressions and wrongs can be forgiven and righted, but if they accumulate over time and allowed to fester, resentments can build up and become much harder to heal.
At other times, the breakdown of a marriage stems not from any direct fault of either spouse. Lack of communication, loss of intimacy, the pressures of family life, and similar problems can occur as natural byproducts of married life. When two persons have been married for a long time, they tend to take each other for granted and sink into a marriage rut. But again, there are ways to remedy the situation and bring harmony and romance back in the picture.
Here are some helpful suggestions on how to avoid divorce and make your marriage work:
- Set aside some quality time together. Even though the couple may be bombarded with chores and work commitments, they should still have a ‘date night’ every now and then. This is a time that they should just enjoy being with one another, just like when they were first dating. It need not be a formal date. A walk in the park or watching a movie together will do.
- Openly and honestly communicate. This cannot be overemphasized: couples must never stop communicating with each other. If they cannot talk face-to-face, they can text, email or call to keep in touch. What is important is that they stay connected every day.
- Spice up the marriage by doing something new and enjoyable. The couple can try out a new sport, take cooking or ballroom lessons together, or visit a place they have never gone to.
- Be supportive and appreciative of each other. Do not take each other for granted. Be a good listener, avoid pre-judging what the other is about to say, and be civil and respectful, even while fighting.
- Seek counseling when necessary.
Hopefully this article goes some way to showing you, that if you are looking into how to avoid a divorce, it can be done.